Here's a quote from another book by the Jeubs that I'm so enjoying currently called Love Another Child. This quote makes me laugh - it's a great description of what Bob and I have experienced since we've become parents of a large family.
It really is true. And you know what, like most things, having a large family isn't for everyone. After all, I was an only child and so was my husband for about 13 years until his brother came along.
Large families are definitely out there, but they are certainly not the norm anymore as they once were many years ago. We don't need children to help on the farm like we once did, or to help bring in extra income for the family. So families have gotten smaller. Having two or three is more commonplace.
And that is all fine and well. But should the rest of us be thought of as crazy just because we go against the "norm"? As with everything else, a lot of it is mindset.
People in our culture unfortunately don't always look at children as a blessing. Well, they do to a certain point, then having "too many" becomes a burden--
we need a bigger car to fit them all in, we can't go on a vacation at the drop of a hat (forget flying anywhere), we can't go out to eat all the time, the noise levels are reaching the crazy level :)
Then we start to say, "Well, maybe [insert your number here] is enough."
And, when others go against that cultural "norm" that again is always out there, looming....... when they are crazy enough to profess that they (like me) love the idea of driving a 15 passenger van, or that they think more kids would be nothing but a blessing, they are given weird looks like they certainly must have lost their mind!!
And then the whispers begin.
"Did you hear that she is pregnant AGAIN ?????"
"Did they really want another child???"
"Don't they have enough??"
"How on earth do they feed them all???"
"Are they really adopting another child???"
What I have always, always, always wondered is WHY?? Why do they care so much about what other families choose for their lives? If it is not impacting them, why do they wonder and talk amongst themselves about the size of someone's family?
Is it because they too wish they could have a larger family but are to afraid to take the leap, to truly follow what GOD wants for their lives and not what society tells us?
Is it because they value THINGS more than they should, and having more children would mean sacrificing more?
And not just monitarily either-- is it that they are afraid of sacrificing more "me" time to the cause of raising their children?
(And I put these thoughts in here as a result of experience not condemnation-- these are all questions I have faced down in my own life when grappling with the thought of having a larger family)
Well, whatever the reason is that people choose to talk and condemn, as the paragraph from the article above states, I will not worry about what others have to say about our family size. After awhile it just rolls off your back. And if people choose to talk, so be it. In the words of Romans 12:14 --
And if you want to look at God's opinion of large families, look no further than Psalm 127 verse 3-5.